Christmas Day, there is a gift under the tree from my older sister. Typical box wrapped in pretty Christmas paper.
Only thing, though…. a coat hanger hook is sticking up from the top.
“It wouldn’t fit any other way.”
Sigh. Smile. Intrigued.
The box gets opened.
It’s a pretty throw blanket on a hanger!
INSTANT uncontrollable laughter comes out of my collapsing body.
I say, “WHY didn’t you just take it OFF of the hanger????”
“What’s so funny? I couldn’t get it to fit in the box! I tried several different ways. It never occurred to me to take it off the hanger….”
My husband: “Couple of things here, Stace!
Fold the hanger inside the blanket.
OR, just take it off the hanger.”
Me: “You got straight A’s in Quantum Physics, but it never occurred to you to take the hanger off the blanket?”
She definitely proved one thing: She cannot think outside the box!
This story sums up what it’s like in our house:
I walked into the den this morning and noticed that my husband, Joe, was watching a Christmas concert on TV. I came in on the very end of one of the songs and thought it sounded like a Beatles tune, but I just couldn’t place it. Thinking it was odd that a Beatles song was being performed during a Christmas concert, I said, “What song is that?”
Joe said, “I Married Jeanette.”
Being told more than once in my life that I ask too many questions, all I said was, “Never heard of it.” But I was thinking, “Who’s Jeanette, and what does she have to do with Christmas???”
Joe: “Yes you have.”
Me: “ No, I haven’t.”
Joe: “I’m sure you have. If you heard it, you’d remember it.”
Me: “I don’t think so.”
Joe: “It’s my favorite Christmas song.”
Me: “Well, my favorite is, “Mary Did you Know?”
Joe: “THAT’S WHAT I SAID!”
Me: “No it’s not! You said, “I Married Jeanette,” was your favorite!
It was at this moment that Joe howled! “HOW did you get, “I Married Jeanette,” out of “Mary Did you Know? That’s not even a song!!!”
Me: “That’s what I heard!”
So, the real question is, “Does this story make me look old?”
The kids in our neighborhood are wild, loud, full of life and flat-out HILARIOUS! We are crazy about them and love to tell stories about their antics.
So I’m excited that they have the distinction of being the first entry into my new, “Things I Overheard Today,” series. Here it goes:
For the past week, my husband has had a bad cold. Nothing serious, but he’s been coughing like he has Tuberculosis. No fever. He doesn’t really feel bad. He just sounds like he’s coughing up a lung. [An important fact that brings me to the point of the story.]
Tonight, we walked out of the front door to pick up a pizza for dinner. Halfway down the sidewalk, Joe barely coughed. I mean, it was barely a regular cough from a person not suffering with a cold. And quite frankly, I barely noticed it. But instantly…. and I mean INSTANTLY – we heard Lily from across the street shout (in her best melodramatic voice):
“That’s IT! I heard a cough!! We’re all going to DIE!!! We’re ALL going to die from the Corona Virus!!!!”
I stopped in my tracks and howled! I could not stop laughing. When I finally turned to see Joe’s reaction, I saw him down on the sidewalk laughing so hard no sound was coming out.
I LOVE these kids!
The question was, “Do you want to come over and play?” That was 53 years ago. The answer was, “Yes!” And we never stopped.
So….. My childhood friend, Angie, recently had a conference in Memphis, so I decided to join her a few days early for a nice visit since we live nowhere near each other now.
During the trip, she casually mentioned my “perfect life.” I just laughed.
When I got home, I texted her a story describing my first day back to clear up any confusion she might still have about me.
Although this blog (that’s been unintentionally ignored for the past 6 years) is mainly about photography, I have decided to change things up a bit and concentrate on creativity in general. So I’m going to add a section and call it, “Keeping it Real.” A great comment stolen from my “terrifically hilarious and to the point cousin,” Anne.
Ah! A Day in the Life of LEW-LEW’s “Perfect Life:”
She sleeps late and is completely rested while driving to work. Her job is a stress-free breeze, and everything goes right – all day long.
Dinner and a loving husband are waiting on her when she arrives home. She kicks up her feet after dinner and drifts off to sleep dreaming of another great day ahead of her.
Still waiting for that day to happen.
What really happened today:
She almost wrecks her car several times on her way to work due to sheer exhaustion. Her co-worker calls in sick because her husband has Covid and she thinks she and her baby do, too. Work is busier, crazier and wilder than normal, but she manages to not get fired.
When work is blessedly over, she drives to her sick co-worker’s house to drop off her hard drive so she can work from home, and manages to keep herself at a safe distance – she thinks.
Finally home, she encounters a hungry & cranky husband who informs her that after dinner she will be joining him under the house to help make a path for the workman who’s coming on Saturday. Her husband’s mood does not improve while under the house…. and her’s takes a turn for the worse when she discovers a dead rat the size of a large kitten.
After declaring that it’s her husband who will be disposing of the mummified rodent, she walks into the house, takes a shower and climbs into bed and looks forward to that perfect day that just might show up tomorrow.
These two photos are from my new favorite cookbook by Katie Quinn Davies, “What Katie Ate on the weekend.” Here is the RECIPE if you want to make them.
I did not have, nor could I find the sour, or morello, cherries. And I also could not find the Dutch process cocoa powder. So I used dried cherries plumped up with boiling water and regular Hershey’s cocoa. They taste pretty good, but I bet they would be much better with the more expensive ingredients.
These are also from the same cookbook, Quinoa and Grape Salad.
I had most of the ingredients for this one. It’s pretty good, too.
Obviously, I did not make this gelato. I bought it for a specific reason, and I’m so glad I did. I wanted to buy some high-end chocolate bars for my husband; but since my car’s air conditioner works whenever it wants to, I was afraid I was not going to make it home in time before the chocolate melted. My solution was to buy something cold to keep in the bag. The only thing I could find in The Fresh Market was ice cream. And in this case, gelato. The least expensive one was Talenti. Being a sucker for packaging helped, too. I also thought I could use the gelato for a photo. So, voila! You have to work fast with frozen desserts, even inside. So I composed the photo with an empty dish before adding the gelato. Since this flavor is toasted almond, I sprinkled some sliced almonds on top. I also drizzled some chocolate sauce to add a little contrast. After I finished shooting, I finally tasted it. I have never, in my life, had better ice cream. Granted, I’ve never had gelato. But if it all tastes this good, it has won me over. But I can highly recommend this brand. I think I paid $5 or $6 for the pint. So it’s not cheap, but not too expensive, either.
I have both of Gwyneth Paltrow’s cookbooks, and this muffin recipe is from her first one, “My Father’s Daughter.” It is very easy to make, and pretty healthy. I, as usual, used what ingredients I have in my house, so it’s a little altered from hers.
Banana Walnut Muffins
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons canola oil
1 cup whole spelt flour
1 cup white spelt flour
1/2 cup barley flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon fine salt
3 very ripe medium bananas
1/2 cup real Vermont maple syrup
1/4 cup brown rice syrup
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup raisins
1/2 cup toasted walnuts, chopped
(I can never find spelt flour, so I used unbleached all purpose and unbleached whole wheat flours. I also did not have barley flour, so I just used 1/2 cup of the whole wheat in its place. Also, I used 3/4 cups of maple syrup because I can never find rice syrup either.)
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a 12-cup muffin tin or oil them with 2 tablespoons of the canola oil.
Sift the flours, baking soda and salt into a medium-sized bowl. Puree the bananas in a food processor or blender and then add the 1/4 cup of canola oil, syrups and vanilla and pulse to combine. Make a well in the flour mixture and pour in the liquid mixture. Stir just to combine and fold in the raisins and walnuts. Do not over mix or the muffins will be tough. Use an ice cream scoop to distribute the batter evenly among the muffin cups. Bake for about 25 minutes or until a toothpick tests clean. Cool in pan for a few minutes before removing to a cooling rack.
I found this recipe in one of my old Martha Stewart Living magazines. I’m going to share the recipe because posted it online. I’m just looking for fun stuff to photograph.
Anyway, it’s pretty easy to make and very tasty.
2 tablespoons plus 2 teaspoons cornstarch
1/2 cup sugar
A pinch of coarse salt
2 large eggs
2 cups milk
1 vanilla bean, split and scraped, seeds reserved (I did not have this, so I just dumped several squirts of extra vanilla extract.)
1 tablespoon unsalted butter, cut into small pieces
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
1 ounce milk chocolate shavings for garnish (I used dark chocolate)
Prepare an ice bath; set aside. In a small bowl, combine cornstarch, 2 tablespoons sugar and a pinch of salt. Whisk eggs in a separate bowl until smooth. Whisk in cornstarch mixture.
Combine milk, remaining sugar and vanilla bean scrapings in a medium saucepan. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Slowly pour milk into egg mixture, whisking constantly. (You’ll want to really pour a little bit at a time here to allow the egg mixture to come up to temperature slowly. Otherwise, they will cook like scramble eggs.)
Return mixture to saucepan set over medium-high heat. Bring to a boil, whisking constantly, until thickened – about 2 minutes. Remove pan from heat, and transfer mixture to a medium heat-proof bowl.
Whisk in butter and vanilla extract. Set bowl in ice bath, stirring occasionally, until chilled. Serve pudding with chocolate shavings on top, if desired.